Me, Myself & I

Me:  Holy Hell!

Myself: Really? Must you swear all the time?

I: Oh Snap! You just have to egg her on don’t you? *sits in the corner chanting “not again, not again, not again”

Me: What’s it to you? You condescending bitch!

Myself: Well, it’s offensive. Not everyone swears like a sailor. You’ve done it all your life. It’s like it’s your native tongue. I don’t even think you’re aware you’re doing it half the time and I’m surprised more people say something to you about it or at least look at you funny. It really is unbecoming.

I: *mumbles “oh shit, oh shit, oh shit” with her ears covered and her eyes closed*

Me: Listen, I don’t do it all the time. I only do it when I’m angry! Or when I’m really happy. Or when I’m very sad. *frowning*

Myself: Exactly! You do it ALL the time. Do us all a favor and STOP! For the love of God, just stop. The next time your going to say the “s” word…say sugar, or the “f” word say fudge, or the “h” word…say heck…It’s really very simple.

I: * opens her eyes and looks around…before uncovering her ears*

Me: Okay, I’ll try but when I write, all bets are off.

Myself: Well, that’s a given…

I: Ya gotta love compromise 😉

finger to lips

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